Jesus with worshippers at Bamboo

Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar – 17th July 2010
Assessment Time: 11:00PM – 04:00AM
Opening Hours: 10:30 PM- 04:00AM
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.urbanagent.com.au , http://www.martinplacebar.com.au
Address: 51 Martin Place, Corner of Elizabeth Street Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Casual allowed. Half the dudes are smart casual, and the other half are just.. casual. Girls are all in dresses and wearing their faces. Lots of pretty girls. And they’ve relaxed policy somewhat – they have allowed hats to be worn inside!
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free entry all night if you wore white. Otherwise standard cover charges apply. $20 on guestlist before midnight. Free on guesetlist if you get to the counter before 10:30 (small chance), and $25 after midnight.
Guestlist: eric@urbanagent.com.au
Occurence: Every Saturday only.
Inside: Walk into a small bar to hold about 150 or so people – DJ at the front corner. Bar on the right hand side of the venue,taking up half of the floor space. 4 podiums are dotted along the length of the dancefloor, including one with a dancing pole. Small private area at back but was really open to anyone who walked in. Outdoor smoking and BBQ area on the left of the venue.
Cloak Room: $5 for all items.
Bar: I can’t remember. 3 ABC shots for $36 ?
Music: Primarily Hip Hop / RnB tonight. Top 40 and Commerical House mashup as well. DJ’s are mixing it well, keeping the crowd always active and dancing.
Crowd: Dominantly Asian. I spotted 2 white girls, 3 black guys as the minorities here tonight. There were probably a few more handful of the minorities. Age wise it varied, but most people I met were in their early 20′s. It seems as all the teens have gone to Funky. Bad news in a few years time for Bamboo as they would soon have no base.
Entertainment:Theme tonight was White. White balloons all over the place. MC to keep things going. Podium dancers, but only one or two. BBQ outside to feed your tummy. Similar to Shanghai Nights (well, it is the same promoter)
Atmosphere: At its peak, the place is extremely packed, and you would be hard pressed to find some floor space to dance – you would really need to hop up on the podiums to have your own dance action. Outside of peak periods it was still pretty busy. Most of the crowd are singing along to the songs, so pretty vibrant.
Video: 360 of Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar (at the back)

Click here to view the embedded video.

Jesus have a hairband

My hair got caught up
My wig hair is about shoulder length. Bamboo is a very very packd event. Inevitably my hair got caught up in many peoples zipper jackets, and it was pretty annoying. Also while dancing, the hair would get caught in the rings that girls were wearing. Pretty annoying for the girl, but I found it funny.

Balloons are not fun
Someone tied up three balloons to the back of my hair. For a fleeting moment I had the insane idea of repeating what I did last year at Bligh Bar, but quickly brushed it away. Anyway, the balloons on my hair didn’t last long – after they got entangled in one of the chandeliers, I had to manually undo it from my hair. It was an embarrasing look, standing in the middle of the dancefloor undoing these balloons.

I fooled one girl
Girl: “Can I wear your wig?”
James: “its real”
Girl: “nah, its not!” (tugs the wig and by sheer luck, it manages to stay on in place ) “OH MY GOD IT IS REAL! I’m so sorry I pulled it!”
James: “Yup”

Girls who look like who they have seen Jesus. Oh wait…
You walk around and a girl turns around. She look and YELLS IN HORROR like she saw a ghost. It happened twice. It really is amazing how scary I look, right? haha. I love this outfit.

Pole dancing
There is Korean looking chick who has taken pole dancing classes. Look at the pic and look at the crowd, all amazed at her style. Show off, but I must admit, it was hypnotizing.

Upside down pole dancer shows off

Multiple podiums (The Jason effect)
Last year when I went to bamboo, they had 2 small podiums, and one would always be dominated by Jason, the resident Korean bum dancer. Tonight, they have installed four podiums. I do suspect that it was a mitigation against podium hogs, and it has worked – you can dance on one podium and people around you will love you, but other dancers on the other end of the club are staring at their own podium. Focus is mostly on the pole dancing podium, to see what tricks people can get upto on it.

Standard dance moves while wearing robes or looking like Jesus
If you ever find yourself in the presence of a Jesus lookalike, or wearing holy robes, here are some holy moves that I discovered that would certainy send a message to the heavens above to let them know you ain’t gonna stop partying in heaven:

- The prayer: Simple yet effective, clasp your hands together in a prayer position. From here, keep your hands together and move up and down. Bend over for effect. For variation, move hands in a circle or above your head to move to a Thai / Egyptian style dance.

- The Hallelujah: A bit more daring, and effective with robes. Both hands in a diagonal manner away from your body, and pump them up and down at the elbows, with palms open, reaching for the sky. It’s a real crowd pleaser if you are up on stage, as it is very easy to follow. See images above on demonstation.

- The Holy Whip: Again, a robe only dance move, and the ad-hoc adaptation of the classic wind up your towel and whip the other dude. Grab a part of your robe that is dangling off and hold it about 1 metre up from the base. Lift it up and fling it quickly back and forth onto a persons buttocks. Perform the fling quicker for a better ‘ouch’ effect.

Here’s a video of me dancing

Click here to view the embedded video.

Really really packed. ugh.
During the hour at around 11:30PM until about 1:30AM the main dancefloor is undanceable. You stand in the dancefloor trying to dance, but you end up just letting people through your circle or bumping into other people. You either would have to dance at the far back where it was boring, or way at the front, where it was similarly away from the action. However it was still somewhat danceable.

I saw my cousin!
Ran into my cousin. He’s 23 and engaged already. His fiance was there as well. He couldn’t believe what I was wearing. His best friend was there who met me before, but I had no idea who he was, haha. Anyway we had a chat and he asks where my girl was. I pointed to a girl I met at the bar – he understood the bro code and pushed me back to her. I love him.

Too hard to hold a conversation
Being as awesome as Gandalf the white has its downsides. Primarily that I could not hold a converation with any person – male or female for longer than 5 minutes. I would have someone else run up and tell me how awesome they thought my outfit was or how they wanted a photo. How could I not take these compliments or photo opportunities. Many thought I was working here. Aww hell no!! A girl even asked for my business card. It got me dreaming of a business card – it’ll be one of those cards that when you open up, would play a random RnB or House tune in similar vein to classic old school mobile phone tunes! Awesome:

CLUBBING WITH JAMES TRAN
‘THAT GUY WHO NEEDS A LIFE’
Nightclub and event reviews at:
www.JamesTran.net

Hmm.. I like it! I might go make some.. they’re not expensive to make. Watch this space.

Arrivederci
Kicked out at closing time. Place had about 20 people still in it when they finally kicked us out.

Post mortem
Busted by someone who saw me at the last white party
Outside Verandah Bar: JAMES! JAMES!! He screams. Who the fuck is this guy coming up to me?
JAMES!! YOU’RE WEARING THE SAME OUTFIT AGAIN!
Oh shit. Totally busted. It was a guy who I met at the I Heart Uni White Party a few months ago. I remembered him and we had a good old chat. Luckily nobody at Bamboo came up to say they recognized me

Recommendation
It’s a nice place to meet people, but its way too squashy to dance during peak hours.

Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar – 6.5/10

Fridays @ The Golden Sheaf Hotel
Assessment Time:11:00PM – 1:00AM
Opening Hours: 10:00AM – 2:00AM (Friday and Saturday)
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.goldensheaf.com.au
Address: 429 New South Head Road, Double Bay, Sydney.
Dress Code / Door Policy:
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free Entry all night
Guestlist: None
Occurence: It’s open every night. Tonights live band act is assumed to be at least every Friday. There is a DJ also on Saturday nights.
Inside: The Golden Sheaf runs over 2 levels. Enter via the bottom level into a hallway. Standard Pub to hold 50 or so people and TAB on the left and pokies room on the right. Walk through the hallway to enter the rear entertainment quarter. It’s a big beer garden and obviously recently renovated. Patio heaters, tables and chairs are everywhere. Floor space of the back end takes up about two thirds of the whole place. On the right rear end corner is the main bar, kitchen and dancefloor to hold about 80 or so people. There is a elevated podium with enough room for a 4 piece band to play. Stairs on the right and walk up to a recently renovated lounge area of about 3 main rooms and another bar, with balcony to look over the beer garden. Walls are decorated with flowery / artsy patterns. You can smell the freshness up here. However in essence the actual dancefloor itself is pretty small in size.
Cloak Room: No cloak room facilities. People who were dancing, simnply dumped their stuff in a big communal pile of jackets and bags at the front of the stage.
Bar: I didn’t buy any drinks tonight. The depth of the line was about 1.5 people deep, so you do have to wait a few minutes.
DJs / Acts: A cover band was playing until midnight – with the lead singer mentioning the crowd to look out for them on the X-Factor next month in August. Well, they hd to be at least decent. After midnight, an assumed resident DJ took over.
Music: (upto midnight) The cover band played a wide genre of songs including rnb, commerical house, classic love songs from the past decades, and pop. There was no mixing here, just songs played from beginning to end in a set. (After midnight) The DJ played a mix of RnB, Commercial House, and Top 40. Yes there was some mixing done up here. The choice of music didn’t really blow me away, and some songs left me standing there wondering why they were chosen. It was a very safe selection, and not really meant to replicate a pumping club atmosphere I suppose. It was however, good enough to get people dancing.
Crowd: One would assume mostly locals, and that’s true. There are also a small component of backpackers here
Entertainment: Tonight it was just the live band and DJ. There are two TVs on the edge of the dancefloor, playing Stephen Chow’s “Kung Fu Hustle” on loop. I have no idea why they have chosen this movie, but its pretty funny.
Atmosphere: On the dancefloor it felt pretty vibrant before midnight while the band was playing. When the DJ decided to rock up, it got a little more dancey, but it wasn’t loud thumping, but loud enough to keep the energy up. Wasn’t packed or dead – it seemed right.

Timeline:

We are probably the best
there was some room in the front corner where we stood, and then we started to dance. It was just a little jig but Marty decides to just go full out with his bloody popping. Ok, everyone just ends up staring at us in amazement, which is what we wanted anyway. That was easy.

Bad excuses to not give out your number to me
Random: ‘Youre awesome’
James: ‘Yup. Want to hang out again?’
Random: ‘Yup!’
James: ‘Whats your number?’
Random: ‘I dont give my number out to strangers. How about I see you here next week?’

Seriously, its better to say ‘no lets not hang out again, just tonight’, or even the just as bad ‘I have a boyfriend’. Really. “I don’t give my number out” – PUH LEEZE

An inspirational movie for dance
Running out of dance moves, so I look above where the TV is playing “Kung Fu Hustle” starring Hong Kong action star Stephen Chow. Most of it is just all the fight scenes, so there are easily many punches, jumps, hand movements and body shaking dancemoves that were easily replicated and looked pretty good on the dancefloor. Try it sometime my fried.

Arrivederci
Left at 1AM to attend to other appearances. The whole place (with the exception of upstairs) is still busy with people drinking, and dancing on the floor.

Recommendation
I wouldn’t make my way out here for a pure clubbing experience, but if you do find yourself in the area, do check it out for a quick dance and soak yourself in the atmosphere. It’s a very good place for a drink otherwise.

If you were just here for a proper dance – be prepared to only properly have a DJ for 2 hours, and prepare to be bombarded with songs from every genre known to mankind.

The Golden Sheaf Hotel (pure dancefloor component): 2.5/10

The Golden Sheaf Hotel Overall: 7.5/10

Dancefloor @ Coogee Bay Hotel Sydney

Saturdays @ Coogee Bay Hotel
Assessment Time: Midnight – 03:00AM
Opening Hours: Unknown – 03:00AM
Lockout: None
Website: www.coogeebayhotel.com.au
Address: Coogee Bay Rd, Coogee, Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Casual was ok tonight. Sneakers and hats allowed. Half the crowd wore t-shirts, the other half, casual collars. Only a handful of people including us were nicely dressed. I certainly felt very well dressed as I walked in tonight.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free tonight, but these guys have the fingerprint scanners installed. I get worried when a venue has this technology as it would only mean violence has occured here before.
Guestlist: None tonight. It was a regular Saturday, and the Coogee Bay Hotel does its own promotions.
Occurence: Every Saturday bar special events where entry fee applies.
Inside: The actual club is just one section of the whole complex – similar to how The Albion is setup. Walk in and the live band room is on the right, sports bar on the left. Keep walking in to enter the large beer garden at the back, and bistro on the left. On the right is the club. In the walkthrough video below, we walk from the entrance straight into the club. The clubbing room itself has a wooden dancefloor to hold about 100-150 people comfortably. Some lounges around the surrounding carpeted areas. It feels a little bare, but the whole place is dark, so you eventually forget about the barebones setup. 
Cloak Room: None
Bar: Did not buy from the bar tonight. However throughout, the line was about 2 people deep. Expect at least a 5 minute wait.
Music: Non-Commercial House, Dubstep, Rnb/pop mashup.
Crowd: Mostly young people here. Teenagers and early 20′s. A handful of people in their 30′s as well, who have come for a bit of a dance after dinner I guess. Pretty much everyone here was caucasian, and probably locals. I would not imagine a non-local making the trek all the way out here on a regular night.
Entertainment: No MC, no podiums. Just the DJ and dancefloor, and some UV lights
Atmosphere: It was busy throughout the whole night. It never got too packed, so you could always have room to dance. Sometimes it got close to squishy but nothing to worry about – you could dance somewhere else – the dancefloor was large enough to accommodate - people danced on surrounding carpet areas as well. Pretty dark in some places around the floor but lighting keeps the floor itself well lit.
Evictions: I saw 2 dudes in total kicked out for being drunk. One was ready to start a fight on the dancefloor. The other was throwing TAB betting sheets all over the sports room and pretended nothing happened when questioned by security – paper littered all around him – hilarious.
Video: Walkthrough

Click here to view the embedded video.

With a coogee local! That is not how he normally looks.

Conclusion: This place is friendly for all natios. Way more than The Mean Fiddler, even though I liked it there.

The short man
There was a short man who looked amish but had a brown beard, and he danced funny. For a good 5 minutes he stood there pointing his hand in the air, his finger tapping an invisible button. He was surprisingly dressed well like us. You can see him as part of the 360 video below:

Click here to view the embedded video.

The next 2 hours was spent consoling this random person. She kept telling us that we could keep the money as long as she gets her passport back – as if we would steal stuff! She didn’t even want to go to police, as she assumed she had to bribe them to get anything done – thats how it operated where she came from. We are pretty lucky. Anyway, harsh lesson learnt – use a cloak room. Oh wait, this place didn’t have one. Lesson is, don’t ever put your little purse down.

Post Mortem
Next day, it was revealed that when the club closed, the dude who was meant to take care of the bag forgot he was meant to take care of the bag. He thought it was a strangers bag thinking that the lost bag would be reported lost to police (it was), he dumped the bag on the sofa instead of handing it in to bar staff. He didn’t want police on his back. What a douchebag. A few days later, the bag was handed back to the backpacker, minus all the cash.

Arrivederci
We are ceremoniously kicked out at closing time. The sports bar room remained open if you wanted to keep on drinking.

Recommendation
A generally friendly crowd and good dancing atmosphere and music to break some moves to. However the night was ruined with the lost bag and Martys lost phone. People are so unfreakingreliable. I’m sure this place has its merits though I probably won’t come back here – it does take a while to get here from the city.

Saturdays @ Coogee Bay Hotel: 5.5/10

360 video:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Well this was the dancefloor. Everyone here is really old and I’m feeling very out of place. Two older women like our basic dancing. The other guys questioned what we were doing here.

The DJ looked about 40 or 50, and was playing a lot of retro songs.

Left out of boredom and shame.

Hugos Lounge Sydney Dancefloor

Saturdays @ Hugo’s Lounge

Assessment Time: 09:00PM – 11:00PM
Opening Hours: – 03:00AM
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.hugos.com.au/
Address: Level 1, 33 Bayswater Road, Kings Cross, Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Appears to be strictly smart casual. Collared shirts and dress shoes for men. Dresses for women. Inside I don’t recall any non-collared shirts or guys just wearing casual. Women all are dressed very well. Hats allowed. No mohawks. 
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free on birthday guestlist. $20 after 10PM from what I heard from someone who was trying to get in, but I do not know for certain about this. 
Guestlist: See website.
Occurence: Every Friday and Saturdays
Inside: Walk up the set of stairs to the forked entrance. Take the right stairs to visit the bar and lounge area. It’s mostly for stand and talk and drink. Take the left set of stairs to walk through the narrow walkway and into the main room. Another bar is presented along with an entirely carpeted area with lounges along the walls. An area in the middle for dancing. Overhead disco balls roughly mark the designated dance area.
Cloak Room: None
Bar: Cocktails are roughly $17-$19 each.
Music: House by DJ Dolso
Crowd: Mostly older caucasian crowd. People mostly in their 20′s and older. Being more of a classy place the people are more well behaved.
Entertainment: It was just the DJ
Atmosphere: Definitely pretentious, but the people on the dancefloor seemed pretty friendly which was good. The whole place is very dark, so I guess thats a good thing for everyone.
Video Walkthrough

Click here to view the embedded video.

Timeline:
In terms of actual dance time, it would have been no more than 30 minutes because it was still early. People started to get their boogie on at around 10PM but it was on off until around 10:30PM when there was consistently people on there (abour 4-8 people, which was enough for this small dancefloor area).

It kind of reminded me of the old Privilege bar where it was also dark and small, but here at Hugos it was way classier. Probably a better comparison is that of Loft Bar down at King Street Wharf.

Arrivederci
We left at 11PM. Friends were going to leave, and on top of that I had planned to visit Coogee Bay Hotel.

Recommendation
As this place suggests, it is more of a Bar than a place to club, but dancing is permitted here in the small dancefloor. I am more about dancing than lounging around so I probably wouldn’t come here for an awesome dance, but I wouldn’t mind having drinks here or a birthday. A very nice venue in general but not one for clubbing.

However potentially it could be better at night, as it was only 11PM when we left.
Hugos Lounge – 4.5/10

With Fans of our dancing @ The Sugar Mill, Kings Cross, Sydney

KX Marks the Spot@ The Sugar Mill
Assessment Time: 11:00PM – 01:30AM
Opening Hours: Unknown – 04:00AM+
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.sugarmill.com.au/
Address: 33-37 Darlinghurst Road, Kings Cross, Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Casual OK. Hats OK. Most wore casual. Men had jeans and collared shirts. Girls had a form of dress on.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: $10 standard. No guestlist. A surprise, as it was previously free for all once upon a time. They’ve caught on. Two groups in front of us were told “$10″, and scoffed at the idea, and then turned around to discuss walking away. In both cases, the bouncer and cashier respectively told them “wait”, and offered them free entry. So, what a great idea to try it as well. When we got to the cashier, we were told “$10″ and we immediately discuss the possibility of leaving. Meanwhile, I am waiting for the dude to say “wait, come in for free”, but NO, he doesnt do it! Like what the fuck. Assholes really don’t want us in their venue.
Guestlist: None
Occurence: Every Friday and Saturday
Inside: More of a bar for drinks, as you enter, there are tables and stools all around. Bar on the far end in front. DJ booth on the right. A small opening where it looks like a table or two could have been, is the quasi-dancefloor.
Cloak Room: None
Bar: Did not purchase tonight. The wait is no more than 2 or 3 minutes.
Music: A mix of house, pop, rnb.
Crowd: Mix of backpacker, locals. Mostly caucasian. Mostly an older crowd 25+.
Entertainment: It’s just a pub, no extras.
Atmosphere: Average. you just come here for a drink and dance, and just happen fork out $10 in the proceess.
Video: 360 of the quasi-dance space

Click here to view the embedded video.

Timeline:
More World Cup stuff
These past few weeks have been just ridiculous at the bars and clubs where the World Cup Soccer is being played. Whenever a match plays, inevitably, almost everyone within watching distance are glued to the screen. It really worries me that people have paid money to get into this place and end up watching the matches. OK, I saw a few minutes of the Brazil vs Netherlands match on at the time as well, but only because of peer pressure – and it was only for a few minutes anyway so its alright

Sisters
We met some Japanese folk – two sisters. Friendly, and older than us for sure. They had some friends as well. They were their sisters as well. Usually you dont’ believe these kinds of tales in the clubs but for some reason it was actually believable. The 3 other sisters were avoiding talk to anyone other than themselves. Pretty strange.

Taking over
We took over pretty much right away from the get go. People joined the 4 solo asians in dancing, pretty much leaving everyone else in awe with our dancing prowess. Well except Derelict, who is hopeless at dancing. Some tourists joined us and it was pretty random fun.

Pandora’s camera
There is a girl taking happy snaps with her friends. Then she joins us and takes a happy snap with her camera. She likes it, and takes another one right away. Then another, and then another with various differnt people around the place. She explained she was leaving the country in 3 weeks. After taking the 4th or 5th photo with me, I tried to talk to her, but she instead walked to the next person and took a photo! Some people should just not be allowed to have cameras.

Asian guy James with Pandora the White drunk girl

Arrivederci
Almost the entire place was still watching the match. Non-dancing acquaintances we were with were putting a bore to our night, so we left for some Harry’s pies and hot dogs.

Recommendation
I would not come here at all. $10 entry? Please. If you wanted to go to a bar that was free entry with a small dancefloor at the cross, I would go to Kings Cross Hotel instead. Crowd is friendly though.

The Sugar Mill – 2/10

Unbelievable.

Meanwhile, people up in the Gold Coast, Wollongong still enjoy $10 entry fees….. In Melbourne, the max is $20 as far as i know. FUCK Sydney sucks sometimes. I hope other promoters don’t up their prices as well thanks to this action. Otherwise, it is just fucked up.

Random photo with Pikachu - Beauty and the Geek theme

I already did Sanctuary Hotel last week – I do try to avoid going to the same venue twice in a row – you risk getting bored easily. The problem was that I made a promise to a friend I would come here tonight. Well, apparently it would be even more busier than last week – lets find out shall we!

Funky @ Sanctuary Hotel
Assessment Time: 9:00PM – 02:00AM
Opening Hours: 10:00PM – 03:00AM (?)
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.funkybuddha.com.au, http://www.phatentertainment.com.au
Address: 545 Kent St - Corner of Liverpool and Kent St, Sydney. Behind 3 wise monkeys.
Dress Code / Door Policy: Tonight, the theme is Beauty and the Geek! Casual OK. Hats allowed. Guys are wearing a mix of casual and smart casual. Girls are mostly in dresses. I saw someone walk in with a Pikachu outfit.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: $25 Standard Entry, $20 on guestlist. Free before 10:30PM. The only slight hope you could get in before 10:30 was to be on a birthday guestlist, and line up in the birthday guestlist line at 9PM. If you got there 9:30PM, you wouldn’t make it. We were on a standard non-birthday guestlist. We got there 9PM AT THE VERY FRONT, and we only managed to get in after 10:30PM! We just stood there as we saw birthday guest after birthday guest walk in. We even stood there watching hopelessly as people off the street just cut the line! Amazing that bouncers could not be more strict on this or have a more foolproof way of being fair on people who actually lined up. Usually lining up 9PM gets you in before 10:30 but the organisers have actually done the right thing, and let the birthday lists have priority. This is how it is meant to be, unlike other venues where it is first come first serve, with birthday people not given priority at all. Well at least cut us normal people some slack. 90 minutes in the cold – give me my $5 discount!!!

Waiting outside Sanctuary with fellow free entry seekers

Guestlist: info@phatentertainment.com.au
Occurence: Every Saturday
Inside: The entrance is not at the normal Sanctuary Hotel entrance. It is via the TAB area further along on Kent St. The room upon entry is where people can have a chat and chill out without actually going outside. Walk in further to the main area, and the large carpeted room has been converted to a dancefloor. DJ on the wall, and a 3 tier podium smack in the middle, dividing the room into two halves. Bar along the far back wall.
Cloak Room: Cloak services are located in the entry room. Standard rip off prices for the event. I think it was $4 for small bags, and $8 for large bags, possibly $5/$10. Who knows. I avoided the cloak room and placed my stuff behind the ATM on the dancefloor. It held up the whole night.
Bar: I didn’t buy any drinks tonight. Waiting time 3-4 minutes or less.
DJs: Sefu, etc etc.
Music: Mostly Contemporary RnB / Pop, with the occasional house mashup.
Crowd: Mostly Asian, and mostly teenagers
Entertainment: Last week the podium was a three tiered podium. This week it is 3 separate podiums. One podium was rectangular to hold upto 5 or 6 people, while the other two were solo podiums which could hold upto 3 people. This freed up some dance room to walk around. Also an MC to keep things up.
Atmosphere: It got pretty busy quite quickly, then it got immensely packed on the dancefloor. Lounge areas – most seats are taken.
Video: Walking around the dancefloor 

Click here to view the embedded video.

Timeline:
Not used to this attention
Being early to line up, we are early in. Dancefloor already has some people dancing, so jump in we go, doing geeky dance routines. Then BAM! 6 korean girls surround and dance with me. I really didn’t know how to handle this. So I kept doing the stupid dance. They were going to leave in 1 hour to watch the Korea vs Argentina world cup soccer match at Darling Harbour. Why they hell did they spend $20 to stay here for an hour? Anyway, one had braces but she didn’t want a photo with me, even after I offered $5 for a photo. When the official photographer came, she actually ran and hid behind her friends. That made me laugh. Watching someone literally RUN and DUCK to avoid having a photo taken. hahaha

People too lazy to dance or who cant dance watch a world cup soccer game

No dance for the man
Minute 1: The podium is empty.
Minute 2: The podium is empty.
Minute 3: James is on the podium dancing.
Minute 4: James is kicked off by security. No reason given.
Minute 5: The podium is empty.
Minute 6: Girl is on the podium.
(10 minutes later): Girl is still up on podium!!!!!
Sexists!!! I tried a further two times to get up on the podium and stay there for longer than 30 seconds, but the security dude kept pulling us down. One third and final ditch effort resulted in a girl jumping up and grinding with me. The moment she jumped off, I was asked to get off the podium again. Total bullcrap.

Free Shots!
We met a dude and he liked our enthusiam so much he bought us drinks, and kept buying us more and more. He refused to take payment from us. We can’t say we didn’t try to pay back the guy.

Too busy on the dancefloor
It was now so busy it got to the point where the only space to dance was on the carpeted area outside the direct dancefloor. Fair enough, so we danced to our hearts content here. People found it amusing and some joined the silly antics. Was fun! Most though just sat there in the lounges staring at the other people having fun. They definitely were not coming back here.

Arrivederci
All my friends left, so Marty and I went off to Shark Hotel to continue dancing into the night.

Recommendation
Much more busier tonight. Not many in theme. Very upset that a 90 minute line up did not result in free entry, while a handful of people were seen pushing in. What can you do? Atmosphere pretty good. Music is great for a contemporary RnB joint. As much as I do not like to admit it, I had a better time tonight sans the lining up trouble. If only they let a man dance for more than 1 minute on the podium…

Funky @ Sanctuary Hotel: (Beauty and the Geek)- 7.5/10

Me with one of the fans in the attempt to keep the temperature cool

It’s my birthday weekend, but I really didn’t plan anything for Saturday. A friend has invited me to Sanctuary Hotel – The last time I walked in, the air con wasn’t working correctly for large crowds and it became stuffy and overheated. Since then I have been assured things were ‘fixed’. So let’s check it out – here we go!

Funky (Buddha) @ Sanctuary Hotel
Assessment Time: 12:15AM to 02:45AM
Opening Hours: 10:30 – Unknown
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.funkybuddha.com.au, http://www.phatentertainment.com.au
Address: 545 Kent St - Corner of Liverpool and Kent St, Sydney. Behind 3 wise monkeys.
Dress Code / Door Policy: Casual ok. Hats allowed.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: $25 standard. $20 on guestlist before midnight. 
Guestlist: info@phatentertainment.com.au
Occurence: Every Saturday Night.
Inside: The entrance is not at the normal Sanctuary Hotel entrance. It is via the TAB area further along on Kent St. The room upon entry is where people can have a chat and chill out without actually going outside. Walk in further to the main area, and the large carpeted room has been converted to a dancefloor. DJ on the wall, and a 3 tier podium smack in the middle, dividing the room into two halves. Bar along the far back wall.
Cloak Room: Cloak room is located upon entry. Not utilized tonight but I would imagine it to be the same rip off pricing as of previous nights at the previous Verandah Bar venue.
Bar: Did not utilize tonight, but the wait was a bit longer than usual. Line was 2 or 3 deep. Bar closed altogether at 2:30AM, in a safe assumption that too many fights spoil the bar.
Music: RnB, Pop and some House mashup
Crowd: Mostly Asian. Mostly teenagers or early 20′s. You can tell via the baby faces and hair styles. I fit right in.
Entertainment: Podium dancers throughout the night. It’s good enough.
Atmosphere: It’s setup to encourage lots of dancing, which is good. The humidity of the last time I was here is gone – Fans are installed and air con is setup just right for a danceable experience. People are not as friendly but what else do you expect from 18 year olds. Carpeted area gives the place a more friendly vibe as well as the second room to allow people a breather is also good. It’s also pretty busy on the dancefloor itself, enough to have your own dance, but not sardine packed.

Podium dancer - Funky @ Sanctuary Hotel

Fights: I saw two fights break out tonight. One you may see typically at a club, but two in one night is bad. Ha. Teenage angst and alcohol.
Videos:

Walkthrough of the dancefloor area. 

Click here to view the embedded video.

360 View

Click here to view the embedded video.

Timeline:
The world cup
It only comes every 4 years. Tonight it was Australia vs Ghana. I sat for the majority of the match in the secondary room watching the game with my fellow clubbers. I know, it wasn’t utilizing the most of my $25 but I have to watch it. It was really upsetting to see Kewell red carded. Very unfair.

This definitely deserved a red card
So after the match I am trying to get through the crowd, but I face a wall of some dancers. I stand there for a few seconds waiting for a gap to open up so that I could continue on. A girl behind me pushes me. Ok, I was near their group so I step back a bit but I still can’t go through. Then, ANOTHER SHOVE from the same group, this time more violent – as if to tell me to fuck off already. HEY – IM JUST TRYING TO WALK THROUGH, AND COINCIDENTALY STANDING NEXT TO YOU GIRLS. I AM NOT EVEN LOOKING AT YOU. WHY SHOVE ME FOR?? Fuck you, fucking teenagers.

Used the birthday card
Was getting bored, and there was a circle of about 8 girls just dancing away. So I asked marty to jump in the middle and dance. He said no. I used my birthday card and forced him to go. He agrees and jumps in and dances. Great! It works and we all start dancing for my birthday. I think they were laughing at us rather than with us when we were dancing.

We have a fan from a previous clubbing night
An area in the back opened up and we go back to dance. Another dude joins us, and I shake his hand after. He says he met us last time at Macquarie Hotel! I don’t remember him at all, but if he knows where I was in the past, then I believe him. It’s been a while since I’ve been recognized randomly- I was starting to miss it.

Arrivederci
Left just before 3:00AM from being bored. The place was beginning to die down ratio wise.

Recommendation
This is not such a bad place to go, and a definite improvement on Verandah Bar. Do keep in mind its Asian teeny bopper night here if you are of the older classy type. Seeings two fight break outs in the short time I was here was a little disturbing, but that is expected in any club with young people.

Funky @ Sanctuary Hotel – 6/10

Marty, beer breath dancer and I - The Tunnel Nightclub Sydney

It’s my birthday weekend, but I’ve already had two dinners, a karaoke and meat tray raffle birthday party. My friends are getting sick me celebrating, and I still had a house party to host as well. Tonight was my clubbing choice of night out, so here we go!

Addiction @ The Tunnel (Formerly Dragonfly) Sydney
Assessment Time: 11:30PM – 03:30AM
Opening Hours: – 03:30AM
Lockout: 02:00AM ? We tried to leave at 02:30AM but was told it was lock out if we tried to re-enter.
Website: http://www.tunnelnightclub.com.au, http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=166455593127
Address: 1 Earl Place Potts Point / Kings Cross, Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Smart Casual. Hats were allowed inside. Groups of guys are allowed, and people of non-caucasian backgrounds were welcome tonight. Can you believe it?? The racist door policy of the old Dragonfly club on Fridays was no longer evident. This is primarily because tonight is an RnB event. However I do not know if their Saturdays have relaxed their door policy. Guys inside tonight are dressed mostly with collared shirts, and the girls are all dressed up and looking very good. There was a dancing girl with multicoloured boots with funky lycras and loose shirt etc, like a dancer from the fluro 80′s, and so it is safe to assume as long as you look good, you can come in no matter what you are wearing.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: I got free entry as it was my birthday, but if you submit a standard guestlist, the cover charge would be $10 before midnight. I am unsure what the standard non-guestlist entry fee is. I would assume this to be $20.
Guestlist: I sent mine to nathan@exclusivproductionz.com.au, though there are probably other email addresses as well. There is also the Facebook group.
Occurence: Every Friday
Inside: Similar to the old Dragonfly, as you walk in you are presented with lounges with a bar behind. Surrounding the bar are booths and lounges. One of these booths was mine. On the left is the dancefloor, which seems more open. The DJ booth has moved from the far left wall to the side of the dancefloor closer to the bar, to replace a booth that used to be there. In the old place of the DJ seat, is an elevated podium for the show offs to dance to the side of the crowd. A glassed off private area to the left exists as well but nobody has booked it tonight, and it remains closed off for the entire night.
Cloak Room: Yes, there is a cloak room offered (its on the far left behind the dancefloor) but I am not sure of the pricing. We just left our stuff on the booths during the night.
Bar: I didn’t drink alcohol tonight but waiting in line didn’t take long at all, at most 3-4 minutes, unless there was a big order in front of you. No more than 1 person deep.
Music: Primarily RnB and pop, with some house, Baltimore, etc as advertised.
Crowd: The crowd tonight was mostly Euro. Minority consisted of blacks, us asian dudes, some backpackers. You can’t tell who were the backpackers as they are all dressed like everyone else. Most of the crowd are young, but there are some older folk (ie myself) in their late 20′s and met some people in their 30′s.
Entertainment: There was an MC to keep things moving along.
Atmosphere: A pretty friendly atmosphere. The staff and security are pretty friendly so long as you don’t get on their bad side. No fights tonight that I witnessed.

Photo from my booth at the back of The Tunnel Nightclub

Video: 360 view from my booth

Click here to view the embedded video.

Video: 360 view from the dancefloor taken at 1:00AM

Click here to view the embedded video.

Timeline:
Where are my friends?
This was the question asked by the promoter who was taking care of my guestlist of 50 or so people. I was with only 2 of my friends in line. The promoter had organised free entry for myself and two others as well as a reserved booth to have the entire night. I felt bad that I only brang two people so I lied to him:

‘My friends are behind me’ I reply. I really had no other friends coming. This was a hastily organised clubbing night and I really didn’t invite anyone to come along except 5 or 6 people. This on top of what was mentioned above, in that my friends were sick of my birthday celebrations

Get out of my booth! (and brithday benefits)
I look for the booth with my name on it. I couldn’t find it – all booths were taken and occupied by people! Someone has stolen my booth, but I don’t bother. There were only 3 of us anyway. So its straight to the bar for some water. A tap on the shoulder. It’s the promoter:

‘Look over there’.

He points to a booth. It was just cleared out and is now empty, with a table with four champagne glasses.

‘Thats your booth, and the champagne is free on us’

This guy has just kicked everyone out of this booth and given us free entry and bubbly. Jesus Christ, *now* I feel really bad to bringing two people, but free alcohol!! WOOT!

Reserved for James Tran - Addiction @ The Tunnel

After this write up I would not be surprised if was not offered any more free champagne, free entry or booth reservation.

Continuous assault of women at my booth
So there is 3 guys in a booth which could seat 15 or so people. So what does the promoter do? He sends 3 girls to our booth and asks if we mind if there are extra girls here. “Oh, I guess I dont mind them”. Far out brussel sprouts! I just want my own personal booth for my birthday. A few minutes later here comes another girl, then another.. until there are about 8 girls in my booth – their bags and jackets strewn everywhere. WHY? I don’t want them invading my space. Well I did, but not really.

Don’t trust me with your jacket
Girls were not friendly, even if they were invading my booth. In fact, one walked right up to me, picked up her jacket next to me, and moved it further away from me. Say What? Don’t trust an asian guy sitting next to your precious jacket?? Did I really look that dodgy?? I look like freaking justin bieber right now – I am totally trustworthy!! AGH! This was upsetting, so I left my booth to dance – as there was no room in the booth to dance due to women sitting down with their legs in their way.

More dancing
It’s a bit dark in here, so its hard to take over the dancefloor. The best way was to get on the side podium where everyone could see you. Sadly though it was packed so we had to wait until later in the night when we could actually jump on there and dance.

Danced on the upper podium, and got people videotaping and taking photos of us. I have no idea what they are going to do – put it on facebook? I am moving so fast I would just come out as a blur, especially in the darkness of a club. Found a drunk girl who danced like one, and her breath stank of alcohol. Total turn off. She was fun to dance with. Oh look theres a picture of her at the very top of this post.

Also got stalked by an Indian dude. Everywhere we went , he would follow us, or he would pounce on a girl we were not chatting to. It was kind of creepy.

It sort of died quickly
People started to leave from around 1AM and by 2AM it was pretty dead. You know its dead when I am able to do multiple cartwheels on the dancefloor.

Arrivederci
We are kicked out at closing time. At closing time there are only 4 or 5 people left in the club. Security tells us ‘come back tomorrow.Its busier on Saturday’. Hahaha, every promoters nightmare.

Recommendation
Despite the recommendation by security to visit on the busier Saturdays – it was like comparing oranges and apples as Saturdays are their house nights. Anyway nice clean crowd, danceable music and new refurbished venue makes for a good night out here. It is a safe place to bring friends who may not be into dancing but are happy to drink (ie for a birthday). If people stayed here longer it would have also been good.

Addiction @ The Tunnel - 7.5/10

Macquarie Hotel Sydney Liverpool Dancefloor

I am celebrating a friends birthday at Macquarie Hotel, so here we go!

June Babies @ Macquarie Hotel
Assessment Time: 10:45PM – 03:00AM
Opening Hours: 09:00 PM- 03:00AM
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.macquariehotelliverpool.com.au/ , http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=121829681183563
Address: 269 Macquarie St, Liverpool Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Casual allowed. Most guys here were indeed wearing casual t-shirts, runners etc. Girls were half dressed up half csual. Surprisingly hats are not allowed.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free all night.
Guestlist: Pointless as it was free entry. People who were born in June were encourages to create guestlists to be entitled to 6 free drinks. I sent a guestlist of one person (me)
Occurence: The birthday event is Monthly, but Macquarie Hotel in general is on every Saturday with the same crowd regardless.
Inside: Walk inside to the gaming area. Bar to the right for the area. Keep walking into the main bar area where the bar is also to the right. Bar area has various tables and chairs, and is carpeted. Following up is a strip of patch and a set of lounges. Past the row of lounges is the dancefloor, with overhead convertible roof. Dancefloor to hold about 150 people. Side room to the left for smoking, if the overhead roof was closed. There is also a secondary entrance on the right corner of the dancefloor.
Cloak Room: None
Bar: Shots can only be ordered at the main bar before midnight.
Music: Contemporary RnB for most of the night.
Crowd: Mostly Asian, mostly teenagers. There are a handful of older locals in their late 20s and 30s but these are the minority. I met someone who was celebrating their 18th here. Also my other 18/19 y.o clubbing friends were here. The birthday girl tonight was 22/23 – I can’t remember.
Entertainment: There’s an MC.
Atmosphere: Vibrant, busy and packed on the dancefloor. Way too packed. People openly smoke on the dancefloor as it is open air. Otherwise everyone here is into the dancing / jumping up and down here.

Timeline:
Securing the free drinks
On offer tonight for people born in June were 6 free drinks! Amazing, because I was born in June. A few days before, I asked a promoter what the conditions were. The only thing I had to do to was spam all my facebook friends to tell them about the event. I said I would think about it (no). Well, in any case, a guestlist event in my name was created in my name, with zero guests. Apparently this ws good enough to score free drinks anyway, which I happily got from the MC at the front. The MC actually CHECKED that I was born in June. Never in the history of guestlisting has my birthday been verified until tonight.

World Cup Fever
People are still on about the World Cup. What luck that tonights match was Argentina vs Some Team, where Argentina won 4-0. So while people on the dancefloor are happily dancing away, the rest of us who can’t dance just stare at the soccer match. About half the night was wasted watching the match.

Security still hustling people around
Last time we were here, security were bossing people who were mingling around areas where you are not meant to mingle. Mingle areas include the bathroom, the strip of path between dancefloor and back area, and the bar, if you were not buying a drink. It does keep the people and flow going well though, I have to admit.

Meet my niece, and my fiance
Woo! So I am chatting to a 30 something year old local girl. She’s engaged. Her fiance is here as well at the club. Amazing. So is her niece. Bam! She is hot. Auntie tells me to go for it. Ok, so I strode on up and did a boom boom pow dance (you can imagine the moves), and fiance steps in and pushes me away! He said no, no, no. Auntie didn’t tell someone it was ok. Oh well.

He just turned 18 tonight, Gemini power!

Arrivederci
We left at closing time, and went for a pork roll at the 24 hour place at Cabramatta.

Recommendation
If you are honestly too lazy to head out to the city and live in the area, do check it out. It is the only decent RnB place out west (besides albion in Parramatta), but only if you are prepared to hang out with a young (and potentially dangerous, but I did not witness any fights) crowd.

June Babies / Pure @ Macquarie Hotel – 6.5/10

Clubs that were rejected tonight
Flow @ World Square Pub / Equilibrium:
We planned to go here tonight. There is no line outside. That’s good. $20 entry. Though as we got to the door, the internal line inside to go upstairs was packed. there was about 50 people croweded at the base of the stairs waiting for their turn to go upstairs. Oh hell no – we are not going in! So walk off we go…

Tourism @ Tao Lounge:
There was an event on tonight. The bouncer said “Don’t even bother coming in here.” We wanted to see what it was. Bouncer: “Go in for a bit of a laugh if you want. Nobody is dancing in there”. So we went in side. It was free entry anyway. There was about……….. 17 people including us 4. A guy and girl were on the dancefloor. She is standing doing nothing, and he is moving his arms up and down, like he is perforing curls on an invisible 1kg dumbell. It is ridiculous – and so is the music. We left after a wasted 10 minutes.

V Bar had cover charge so we didn’t go in, but it looked dead.

Puls8 @ Shark Hotel was dead as well tonight. (Saturdays are better).

Our final destination – random private party @ Burdekin Hotel
Continued the merry walk down Oxford St, where we strike up some ye old conversation with the patrons outside Burdekin Hotel. They were nice enough to invite us to their private party upstairs at the top level! Booyah!

Got inside – we are really the only asians here, but everyone here is friendly. Most are dancing, its cool. There’s a DJ and the room is dark and ideal for dancing. Mirror covering the back wall for a bigger impression of the room. Enough lounges for the size of the dancefloor. It’s a nice little place for a private party indeed.

There was really only one other good dancer here, but he seemed to only dance whenever I was dancing, and only with the girls i was cracking onto as well. A bit stalkerish, when a guy tails you around, but what are you going to do aye.

The other half of the time, the girl who brought us in was running back and forth from the bathroom throwing up, lol. Anyway everyone here is friendly. Unisex bathrooms provided much chat fodder as well. Met lots of people that night.

Arrivederci
I think at 5AM we were just really freaking tired, and yet people were still in here dancing their socks off. Bloody amazing. This is how people at a club should be! Would I have my birthday here? It is ok to have a birthday here, but only if there are heaps of people. The atmosphere of the floor provides more for dancing rather than socialising once the music is up and pumping, so check it out first before having an event here.

I wrote an article for the I Heart Uni Magazine, listing clubs to recommend, for their edition which comes out this week. Article was submitted a few weeks ago. Target audience was asian uni students and I was pretty much restricted to outside the CBD. Quite difficult as Asians are as rare as hen’s teeth in the cross or on oxford st.

So anyway, my recommendations were:

1. Havana for Friday and Saturday: Havana Fridays for RnB is no longer. I went to their final night and it was shit as. For Saturdays, my recommendation is still to go here, but the crowd is still Euro and the music still House and Trance if you are into that.

If to find a replacement, I would say Slide Bar on the monthly ‘Bounce‘ Korean night events are the way to go. Unfortunately, they only come once a month.

Also, The Tunnel have RnB on Fridays, but I have not been yet to ascertain a recommendation.

2. Moulin Rouge for either Friday / Saturday: I wouldnt send an RnB lover here. They all hate it. If you like house and if you like dancing, then yes check it out. It’s a great dirty atmosphere. If you don’t like to dance, then avoid this place, as it is quite loud. Crowd is Euro/Aussie

3. The Gaff on Tuesdays: The Gaff Tuesdays is one of the best all round venues I’ve been to. People, cheap drinks, friendly people, wet t-shirt comps and some dancefloor action. It’s good as a safe recommendation for people on Tuesday nights. I still hold this as a recommendations. Crowd is still backpackers.

Thoughts
Most importantly, a good night is usually when you are in an open mood to meet people, and have fun with or without alcohol.

Timeline:
Scoring free entry
It was already 3AM and we didn’t want to pay entry for 30 minutes of dancing, so as my friend thinks about turning around, I tell him that I got it covered. I was going to try and smooth talk my way past these two girls. A tough job but this is $20 we are talking about. So as we walked down the stairs to the cashier, we put on our geek glasses on. Mine had a mechanical wind up moving moustache and eyebrows – its hilariously awesome. I wound it up and let the moustache and eyebrows wiggle around. The girls start laughing so hard its not funny, and we slide on through like snakes. WIN!!!

Now that I’ve written about it, it would probably never work again. We were lucky there was no stamp checker, but I fully expect them to have one now. I do understand why now they have a dedicated stamp checker sometimes at the clubs.

My frames are awesome
Everyone wanted to wear this awesome thing on my face… this wiggly moustache device. It was epic. Random girls and guys are trying to take it off me and when they couldn’t.. they would try to take my zebra tie off. Hmph!! Oh well, I am popular. Sadly this is all I was good for. Nobody wanted to get to know my personality. I am used yet again.

Me and my moustache mask thing

Arrivederci

Place closed at 3:30AM and we leave.

Recommendation
Well it was ok considering it was 3:00AM when we entered. It may have been packed earlier- but all in all, it was a better experience than last time, when it was totally dead.

On the way there, one of the girls who was already drunk had spewed her guts out at Atarmon and so she sent her home along with her 6 other friends. A bit of a downer but we marched on to destination

We finally got there, and it was already roughly 1am. We are greeted by the birthday boy, and he begs us for dancers to join him in the dance festivities as nobody was dancing. Oh, no problem we were going to dance for sure

We got there an the place is all guys, half gay half straight. Oh well. Dance, dance, dance and afterwards we were over the dancing and left after 90 minutes because it was all guys.

-The End-