C invited me to come out tonight – I enjoyed the last event these promoters held, so let’s check it out – here we go!

U n’ I End of Semester Beach Party @ Docks Hotel

Assessment Time: 10pm to 1am
Website: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=165867712492
Address: Shop 225 Harbourside Shopping Centre
Dress Code: Beach attire, but no thongs. Casual ok otherwise
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free if you went in before 9pm. $20 Pre-paid tickets, $25 at the door. Something like that.
Inside: See video below. Basically podiums, a mini catwalk on the dancefloor area. One long bar to serve patrons. One DJ booth today. I am suspecting they did not sell enough tickets to afford a second house DJ.
Cloak Room: Yes, but at exuberant prices. $5 for small items, $10 for big bag (most large handbags). You’re better off dumping it underneath the podiums
DJ: Just one RnB DJ tonight.
Music: Primarily RnB, some electro mashup as is the norm these days. Nothing special, no stuff ups, and good mixing.
Crowd: Dominantly asian.
Entertainment: Inflatable animals, trees to add to the fun. Also, podium girl dancers. Hot. To top it off, a catwalk show where girls walk down and throw off their t-shirts! This was an epic entertainment show.
Atmosphere: It never got packed, but it wasn’t dead either. If you were on your own you would probably not have liked it. It was pretty sad if comparing it to the success of the Pajama party a few months earlier.

Timeline
Getting there early:
So we decided to get there early to bypass the entry fee. It worked – We walked in at 9pm and the after work crowd was still there, all suited up. We mustve been the only ones in beach attire. I wasn’t even game enough to put on my Jack Sparrow hat.

The downside to this was that there was no music playing yet, and we had to wait 90 minutes until the DJ started to crank it up.

YES, I am yet again dressed as a pirate.
By tonight my friends are SICK of my pirate attire – I am not. It was a beach theme, and Beach -> Water -> Pirate Ship -> Pirate. Only 2 degrees of separation!

Waiting for the other people to come dressed up
Most of the guys here came in shorts and shoes (no thongs were allowed in the club). You would expect many of the girls here to wear bikinis, but NO, we barely spotted anyone in beach related gear. There was a sailor, but it was just a sailor hat. There was even a girl with a flower in her hair, which was a poor effort, but one of the best efforts we saw the entire night. People are so lazy these days!

Bikini Catwalk!
Finally, the bikini show starts. Been waiting all night for this. My female friends want to join it. I asked one of the promoters and he says ‘no’ – they had already pre-hired girls to do the bikini show. My friends were pretty cut up. GIven though, the girls who did te catwalk were pretty good looking.

Oh, and heres an awesome video of the entire show!!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Yes that’s right, women are *not* objects.

Oh, here’s another video of one of the girls willingly getting spanked by an inflatable thong!!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Never treat women as objects, unless they ask for it. Much like an exposed piece of meat in front of a lion…

My biggest fan of the night
There was a guy I bumped into – its a small club so we are constantly bumping into each other trhoughout the night. Every time our paths crossed,  we would cheer our yell out “YEAHH!!”, “WOO!” or some other manly happy expression,  and subsequently take a photo. Must’ve taken 5 or 6 photos. Well here’s one of them:

Unable to dance on the podium:
The podiums were setup. I jumped up. I was then ceremoniously kicked off. WHY ARE THE PODIUMS SETUP UP???

Apparently only pdoium girls were allowed to dance up there. Well where were they? Nowhere. Throughout the whole night, only about 30 minutes were spent having the podiums taken by the dancers. The rest of the time nobody was allowed to stand up on the podium. What kinda bullcrap is that?

Well here’s a video of me going up on the podium. (its videos galore tonight)

Click here to view the embedded video.

Right after the video, I get kicked off after about 10 seconds of dancing. It’s really sad that clubbing has been sterilized to the point where patrons can’t even dance up on the podium. Sure, kick the drunk people off, but the sober ones.. keep them up there!!

Inflatable things!

Sharks with floaties

Dolphin Riding

Inflatable thongs

Free Tequila sunnies! (and shirts too)
Exactly like last time here, there were some Tequila promoters. Last time, they were giving away wristbands for any tequila shot that you purchashed.

Tonight they were giving away your choice of sunglasses, womens singlet or male t-shirt – awesome! I got myself a pair of sunnies, since my other pair went MIA. A pretty good deal for $8!

Arrivederci
After the antics of the bikini catwalk, girls want to leave. Sad. I did not mind it here at all, even if it wasn’t as banging as it should be.

My friend stole one of the floaties around her waist by just walking out. How asian of her.

Recommendation
U n’ I Docks Hotel Beach Party – 6.0/10 – mostly due to the bikini catwalk and the floaties. Bad kudos to lack of people dressed up, the lack of people, only one DJ and the inability to dance on the podium.

U n’ I Pajama Party @ Docks Hotel
Assessment Time: 10:30pm – 2.30am
Entry Fee/ Cover Charge: $25 prepaid, $30/$35 at the door. Alternatively you could have come to Docks Hotel before 9.30 for drinks without paying entry and hung around for dance later.
Occurrence: Once off. It was U n’ I’s (the organisers) first event.
Crowd: Dominantly Asian, and almost entirely of uni students.
Music: RNB, House. The typical Sydney RNB DJ’s attended tonight. Sefu.. and Ace and some other ones for the main area. In the side room/area there was also RNB, but the DJ here also mixed it up with some House music. The King of Pop died earlier today, so there was also a 4  song Michael Jackson tribute in the middle and at the end of the night, which was nice of the DJs. A bit of Jackson 5, and then some MJ songs.
Atmosphere: Pretty good. Crowded as people were let in. Most stayed until 1.30.
Entertainment: Dance off, and an all girls pillow fight. Videos of the pillow fight later

360 Video Inside:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Timeline:
Scored a ticket for $5 off from a girl in line
I’m lining up, and a tap on the shoulder. A girl is offering to sell her ticket. I buy it for $20. What luck! The promoter I was supposed to buy it off was reluctant but agreed to let me buy her ticket instead. She and her friends were cute.

I get given the finger from her dwarf friend
later on that night I bump into them and introduce myself to her friends. All are pretty nice, except the shortest girl. She must have been 140cm, shorter than my mum. I bent my knees to shake her hand on her level. Her friends laughed. She took offence and gave me the finger, not jokingly, but seriously and she refused to shake it. So I grabbed her other hand and shook it. She told me to fuck off. lol oh well.

Met a samurai in the toilet
I walked into the bathroom and there were lots of guys changing into their outfits. A samurai walks in and I compliment him. He compliments me back. We found out we have something in common – we both graduated from university already and we both look like creeps. We ended up hanging out for the rest of the entire night, photo whoring ourselves ONLY with people who dressed up in their PJs:

Photo whoring with Samurai man behind me.

Girls Pillow Fight Video!
Purely for the men to watch – there was a mattress installed in the club, and 5 girls were asked to come up and fight it off for a 50 dollar voucher or something. The only rule was that they had to be on their knees. haha, hilarious. There are two fights, so here they are:

Pillow Fight 1

Click here to view the embedded video.

Pillow Fight 2

Click here to view the embedded video.

The girl in the black was voted the winner by audience cheer.

Pajama Party Pillow Fight (Docks Hotel)

I think one of the DJs didn’t like me dancing
It’s around 2am, and In the side room, some awesome house music was playing, and it was just me and my friend dancing. NOBODY else was dancing here, everyone seemed buggered. I love the house music playing so I went up to the DJ and say:
me: “I LOVE House music! RNB over there (in the other room) is crap compared to this!”.
DJ: (nods his head)

The next song he played was RNB. what a slack bastard!!

Dirty floor
After the pillow fight, some pillows were destroyed and the ‘feathers’ were distributed around the floor:

Remnants of the pillow fight lay on the dancefloor

Possessive girls
Psycho girls also stole the teddy bears from the beds. I saw a big teddy sitting on a chair. I walked up to pat it and I hear these huge ‘NOOOO!! AAAAA!!!!’ shrieking devlish noise from 3 girls who had stolen the teddy bear for their own. Just because I’m an asian sailor doesn’t mean I’m going to steal it:

Friend posing with one of the teddy bears stolen

The uni vs uni dance off – SHAM!
“We’re going to have a dance off – so all you people from USYD and Macquarie come to the front of the floor now!!”

This was it. 3 years of clubbing had come to this point in time. It was time to represent. My dancing friend was also from USYD and we wanted to go up and represent!! We figured it out – We were experienced, and OK dancers, and comparitively we would be competing with Macquarie uni students who have clubbed for no longer than 1 or 2 years, if that – since they went to uni they wouldn’t have the time to focus on dance. We were guaranteed a win!

We went up to the front. We hung around, and nothing. We look out and the dance-off had already begun! WTF!! We werent’ even called. The dancers were already chosen for this dance off.

So I went up to the dance circle to see the competition I was potentially up against. You would not believe what I saw. I SAW MY FORMER DANCE INSTRUCTOR REPRESENTING MACQUARIE UNI !!! OMG . He is quite possibly one of the best hip hop dancers in australia, I think he’s choreographed for some routines on “So you can think you can dance australia” and not only that, he’s also 30 something years old, and I don’t even think he went to uni in Australia. Grrr!

I look to the other side who was representing USYD, and you would not believe what I saw. THOSE TWO GUYS I SAW PERFORM AT THE UNSW BSXC DANCE LAST MONTH!! OMG. These guys weren’t as good as my former dance instructor, but they danced in synchronization which made it look cool, but rehearsed. Instructor danced with what came out – that is true dance.

I suppose the general population were oblivious to the sham happening right in front of them. Me and my two friends, who had taken classes with the dance instructor, knew exactly what was going on. At least the crowd and myself were impressed with their moves – If we had danced, they would have definitely been disappointed! STILL THAT’S NOT THE POINT!! grrr.

Sham dance off between the 'two unis'

In the end, USYD won. My dance instructor was 100x better though, but that’s how the cookie crumbles.

Coda
Left due to pure exhaustion and the increasing ratio of men to women. It was 3am. A good night had by all.

Timeline
Got in. Had some shots. Some promoters who gave us free stuff when we took tequila

Free wristbands, lanyards and stickers for taking tequila

Met Vi. She was drunk

Vi off her chops

We had our own little area later in the night to sit and dance around..

Coda

Left 1.30am. A nice night, but there just wasn’t enough people. It was enough to not make it a crap night, but it wasn’t an awesome night either. Just a normal night, so I would be open to visiting again only if there were more people inside. Blame the lack of promotion.

About Glow
What: A once off Indonesian student event. Entrants get glow sticks and party with UV light.
Music: RnB and Minimalist House
Crowd: Young and Indonesian (Indo as they like to be called for short)
Cover charge: Ticketed event. $20 for members of the Indonesian society organising the event. Otherwise it’s $25.

About Docks Hotel:
Located at Darling Harbour, it’s a long stretch with two areas on each end. On one end is a dance area and a carpeted lounge. On the otherside is another loungey area. On a typical clubbing night out there, both ends will play different styles of music. Along the middle are more chairs and a bar, leaving a narrow area to walk through.

What happened:

I crown you Lord James
The line wasn’t that long so it was ok. Once I got in, they gave me these glowsticks. Where am I going to put them? It was then I realized I was wearing my striped elastic hairband. So I put the sticks in my head, and now I had a glow in the dark crown thing. Well it looked more like I had antennae sticking out of my head, looking to pick up any rogue television or alien broadcasts from the air. I think everyone I walked by thought I was some weirdo .. they definitely had a good look at my bright crown as we pass by each other.

Why there are no pictures in this post:
I met Meiny and Dania. We took photos of my lovely crown and of each other. I held onto Dania’s camera. We danced. I took more photos. Gave back the camera. A while later Dania asks for her camera. I gave it to her. No I didn’t she insisted. Yes I did. Well it wasn’t in my pocket anymore. It was gone. Fuck. As I’m writing this post up.. we had negotiated to pay 50/50 for her new camera. Expensive night out!

Meiny tries Absinthe
Asian girl meets Absinthe – we all know how this is going to end. She ran off after the shot and we couldn’t find her. Her SMS to me sums it up:

“Im in toilet.. Fukin spewin”

That’s gold. SMS and spew at the same time? Women are truly masters at multitasking.

The Music:
RNB side: I think they used the same DJ’s as the ones from bamboo, because not after long, the 2nd DJ started repeating the same songs as the 1st one played ! They also had the same MC who usually attends Space and Bamboo.. I don’t know his name. The music was better with the last DJ who played lots of west coast rap. As usual though, the main RNB was the typical shit.

That Akon song ‘I wanna fuck you:’
Meiny has a boyfriend, who isn’t here tonight. I’m dancing with Meiny when this particular song comes up. Oh no. Yes that song. Now really – It was totally awkward because usually you sing along to the songs that are being played. It didnt seem right to sing a song about performing coitus with your mate’s girlfriend. We just stopped dancing. Finally left to the house area after the first few “I wanna fuck you.. ya already know — I wanna fuuuuuckk youuuuu” chants.

My final thought about this song – “Hey dj.. PLEASE Mr DJ… tell me if you can you hear me… turn that fucking music off”

House side:
I’ve escaped to the house side. It’s apparently an Indonesian DJ playing his house. I was hoping for some good commercial house or some thumping beats. But gawd. There was no electro beats.. it was real old school house.. and a bunch of guys were ecstatically dancing to it. Nuts, so I joined in. There was a guy with a fake set of tits running around. It was a good feel.

Otherwise the house music was forgettable.

Fights of the night

1. This was on the way home, we saw a scuffle between two groups of indonesian guys

Guy 1: Don’t fight over a f*cking woman !
Guy 2: I’m not! I’m fighting to defend my friend !

Yeah. Right.

Coda
I’m ending this post early because I’ve got a huge backlog to do. Finished. Went home. I don’t recommend docks unless you like rnb. The both times I’ve been there, there were fights. Crazy.